Window Shopping: Dresses
I am not typically a person one would associate with the word “fashionable”. I own more pajama bottoms than jeans and more band t-shirts than blouses. The last time I wore a dress was about five years ago, and my now-gay-but-then-boyfriend told me I looked “stupid”.
I developed a sort of phobia for all girl-related things. I don’t accessorize, I don’t own a purse, I wear my clothes until they have holes in them and I get really uncomfortable if any part of my chest or cleavage is showing when I’m in front of other people.
I’m sure half of it is insecurity — I feel like either my boobs or my butt will bust out of anything even remotely revealing. The other half would definitely be a mixture of lack of funding for something as frivolous as a wardrobe makeover and pure laziness. I guess that I’d just rather hang out in my PJs and buy comic books instead of a pretty dress.
Another part of it may be that my personal “tastes” aren’t things that normal people wear out in public. Not here, not today, nope. I like bright, flowing fabric and obnoxious patterns. I like girly, frilly, poofy pom poms and ruffles galore. It’s quite unfortunate — Even if I did feel cute in fancy schmancy attire and had the money to pay for it all, I would look like a flamingo amongst a group of penguins. Pengui? Penguini! I don’t know.
In an effort to join with today’s hip and happening blogosphere, I’ve decided to do a fashion post. These are some of the things I would buy if I a) had lots of money and b) were a hundred and fifty percent certain that nobody would ever see me wearing them! 😀
I can’t promise it’ll be pretty. Most importantly, I can’t promise that this hasn’t been a complete and total waste of your time. But if you do happen to see anything that stands out to you as better-than-unappealing, please let me know so I can finally tell people that I know what ~*~*~*FASHION~*~*~*~ looks like.*
* Just kidding, I know what fashion looks like! I’ve seen every episode of the last three seasons of America’s Next Top Model! 😀
You’ll notice a color scheme happening. Apparently I really like pink, gray and teal. HOW STRANGE, I NEVER WOULD HAVE THOUGHT.
I would also probably kill for a pair of Jeffrey Campbell’s Litas in Pink Glitter, but we’ll save that for some other time. 🙂
And here is what I’ve learned from this post and this experience:
1) I like anything that has a bird on it.
2) I apparently have a thing for 50s fashion, which is when dressmakers started to incorporate menswear into their feminine dresses (collars, buttons, pleats).
3) That awkward salmon color that suddenly took stores by storm three months ago has finally grown on me.
4) Chiffon is adorable.